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Remember Me: A Lively Tour of the New American Way of Death, by Lisa Takeuchi Cullen
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In Remember Me, Time writer Lisa Takeuchi Cullen has created a humorous and poignant chronicle of her travels around the country to discover how Americans are reinventing the rites of dying. What she learned is that people no longer want to take death lying down; instead, they're taking their demise into their own hands and planning the afterparty.
Cullen hears stories of modern-day funerals: lobster-shaped caskets and other unconventional containers for corpses; cremated remains turned into diamonds; and even mishaps like dove releases gone horribly wrong.
Eye-opening, funny, and unforgettable, Remember Me gives an account of the ways in which Americans are designing new occasions to mark death—by celebrating life.
- Sales Rank: #2486899 in Books
- Published on: 2007-09-04
- Released on: 2007-09-04
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .54" w x 5.31" l, .42 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 240 pages
From Publishers Weekly
This intriguing survey of America's rapidly mutating funeral customs probes the one force mightier than death: consumerism. Journalist Cullen explores the innumerable ways in which funerals are being personalized, publicized, economized, commercialized, trivialized and, perhaps, humanized. Among the many offbeat memorials she unearths are funerals with Hawaiian, tango or Harley-Davidson themes, as well as beer-themed caskets, eco-friendly funerals, "human diamonds" manufactured from a loved one's ashes, and a Colorado town that celebrates a do-it-yourself cryonics pioneer with its Frozen Dead Guy Days Festival, now a major tourist attraction. In the middle of it all, she finds, is an uneasy funeral industry, squeezed at the bottom by cheap Chinese caskets and the vogue for no-frills cremation and challenged at the top by finicky boomer customers demanding more elaborate and symbol-laden rites (one poignant graveside dove-release attracted a passing hawk, with off-message results.) Cullen isn't much given to muckraking or dark pensées; "Death is a big, huge bummer" is as morbid as she gets. Her set-piece retrospectives on the guests of honor at unusual send-offs sometimes seem dully eulogistic. But for the most part her vivid reportage and wryly sympathetic tone feel anything but embalmed. (Aug.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Review
“Subtly funny, impeccably researched, and utterly fascinating . . . the liveliest book about death ever written.” (Cathi Hanauer, author of Sweet Ruin and My Sister’s Bones and editor of The Bitch in the House.)
“A must read for anyone who plans on dying.” (Mary Roach, author of STIFF)
About the Author
A New York–based staff writer for Time, Lisa Takeuchi Cullen was its Tokyo correspondent, as well as a writer for Money. A recipient of a fellowship from the International Reporting Project, she is a graduate of Columbia University's journalism school and a member of the Asian-American Journalists Association. Cullen was born and raised in Kobe, Japan. She lives in New Jersey with her husband and their daughter.
Most helpful customer reviews
11 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
An intriguing look at changing customs
By Michael J. Edelman
In 2003, author Lisa Cullens was given an assignment by her editors at Time Magazine to look into new trends in funeral services among Baby Boomers in America. This seemed fertile ground for inquiry- after all, around 2.3 million Americans will die in the coming year, and as the population ages, this number will double, if population trends continue, by 2040. Cullens' editor was particularly curious in seeing her write about "wacky" new trends in funerals- NASCAR coffins, artificial diamonds made from the cremated remains ("cremains", in the language of the industry) of loved ones, and that sort of thing. But what she discovered on her journey went well beyond the curious and the strange, although that aspect is represented in this book. She discovered how, as the ethnic and cultural profile of this country continues to change, funeral customs have changed, too, among both the immigrant communities and the native born.
Cullens' journey takes her from the mundane- traditional funeral homes in New York- to the exotic- a Hmong funeral in St. Paul. Minnisota- and the truly bizarre, a pyramid in Salt Lake City where a fellow by the name of Corky Ra prepares bodies in something approximating ancient Egyptian mummification. Along the way she visits schools of Mortuary Science, casket discounters, mourning families, and Dr. Gunther von Hagens, the German scientist/showman, with his traveling exhibit of "plastinated" cadavers. Interwoven with Cullens narration are the stories of a number of recently deceased people, and how they, or their families, chose the celebration that followed their departure. One chapter, on the emerging tradition of "green" burials, in which bodies are buried in such as way so as to quickly decompose and feed the ecosystem impressed me enough that I made a decision to research this for my own (hopefully distant) eventual disposal. The idea of becoming part of a nature preserve sounds much better- and more ecologically sound- than either quasi-permanent internment in a large, and ridiculously costly casket, or being turned into a lot of ash and gas.
"Remember Me" will no doubt be compared to Mary Roach's "Stiff", which is unfortunate, as this is a much better, and much more respectful book; Cullens doesn't treat her subject as something that must be viewed with the postmodern sense of ironic detachment that spoiled "Stiff" for me; rather, she treats all her subjects with deference and with respect, even the fellow making mummies in Salt Lake City. Cullens herself worries that some will also compare it to Jessica Mitford's "The American Way of Death", and makes a point of stressing that her aim is not a debunking of the funeral industry. I don't think to many people will make that comparison- although I suspect a lot of reviewers looking for a point of reference will. The rest of us will simply enjoy a well-written book that manages to be interesting, entertaining, and thought provoking.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
NOT what you're thinking
By Leslie Chalfant
I loved it. I learned a lot about a subject that you really don't want to sit down and discuss with your family and/or friends. Lisa Takeuchi Cullen wrote in such a way that turned a normally sad experience into an elightening journey. I learned I really didn't know as much as I thought I did about the funeral business in America. It is not a depressing book. I laughed at many stories (and the puns...intended, I'm sure). I enjoyed her sort of "journaling" style. I did not want to read a book filled with statistics and business plans. I could not put this book down because each chapter was so interesting. On a recent trip I even got to see the Reef Balls mentioned in the book. A wonderful read and a book that just may change your final decision.
10 of 12 people found the following review helpful.
A tour through the modern rituals of honoring the death of a loved one
By Gen of North Coast Gardening
This fascinating, fun and quirky book takes death out of its usual context of fear and sadness and explores the modern rituals of death in a way that is emotionally easy to read. I felt a little trepidation reading this book, since my best friend's mother just died last month and I wondered if it might hit to close to home, but Cullen found a way of speaking about death and its rituals that is both respectful and irreverent, and it enriched my thoughts about death rather than cheapening them.
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